Ending
by LittleRedOne
Summary: In a minute a million emotions had rushed through my head – shock, horror, relief, guilt, fear, confusion, devastation, worry, so many feelings, too many feelings." For LaPaige's 'One Hundred and One' Forum. Mitchie/Caitlyn friendship. Slight Smitchie.


**A/N:** Watching your best friend break down crying is one of the single most terrible things you could ever experience. Especially when there's absolutely nothing you can do or say to take the pain away – when all you can do is wrap them in your arms and let them cry.

This is a fic for LaPaige's 'One Hundred and One' forum. A link's in my profile to the prompt list if you're interested. This time I chose _3. Ending._

**Dedication:** This is for anyone who's ever had a friend come to you and break down - leaving you feeling helpless.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Camp Rock.

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There's both a beginning and an ending to everything in life. The end will not always be immediate nor will you always see it, but it will _always _happen. For me the beginning came six years previous. I was fourteen years old and I was pulling into what would quickly become my favorite summer camp for the first time. Not long after I arrived I made a friend – one I never planned to find an ending with.

--

I rush up the stairs with only one thought in mind. _Find them._ I'd gotten the phone call with the terrible news twenty long minutes ago. In a minute a million emotions had rushed through my head – shock, horror, relief, guilt, fear, confusion, devastation, worry, so many feelings, _too many_feelings. I rip my purse open to find the suite key and curse myself for all the clutter inside. My hands are trembling and it takes me awhile to actually locate the stupid plastic card and get the door open – I try to ignore the anxiety that no one comes to let me in despite all the noise I was making.

I take a deep breath, wipe at the tears on my face in vain and walk in the room, my eyes scanning for the two people I needed most right now. One look and I know the news already reached here. I see Shane first, sitting on the couch and staring – _glaring_ – at the coffee table, his fists clenched in his lap. Lying beside his feet is his cell phone. He must have gotten the call as well. My heart breaks a little at the tears falling out of his angry eyes; Shane never cries.

I want nothing more than to move to him, comfort him - do something, anything - but I know I can't. I need to find Caitlyn first. I need to check on my best friend. I rush in and the door shuts loudly behind me – Shane doesn't even flinch. Caitlyn's not anywhere in sight and I get nervous. They were both supposed to be here. I was meeting them here and we were going to drive all the cars to meet the guys. I pass the couch and run into Caitlyn's room. I spot her right away, with her headphones on and dancing around the room so freely. My heart stops. _Caitlyn doesn't know_. I have no idea how to tell her yet and quickly retreat from the room before I can be seen. Instead I finally allow myself to check on Shane.

"Shane," I whisper, sitting next to him and hesitantly placing a hand on his fist. He doesn't respond. "Shane," I try again, my tears falling harder now. "I'm _so_ sorry Shane. I'm so sorry." He still doesn't respond and I rest my head on his shoulder, repeating "I'm so sorry," until my sobbing takes over and I know he can't understand me anymore.

He slowly turns his head to look at me and blinks as if he's just realizing I was here. His fists relax and he grips the hand I had placed on his. His other hand lifts my head from his shoulder and we lock eyes. A million silent words are exchanged. I know in an instant that he felt the same guilty relief as me. He leans in suddenly and kisses me roughly. I respond with the same force - the kiss is harsh on both our lips. I can taste our tears as they reach our lips and cry harder. This isn't right, but I can't bring myself to stop just yet. We break apart moments later, gasping for air. It's then that Caitlyn exits her room.

"There you are," she sighs, taking off her headphones and putting them away with out looking up. "I was wondering if you'd forgotten how to get back to the hotel." She does look up then, waiting for a response, when she notices our tears and her face turns concerned. "What happened?"

"Caitlyn," I start before realizing I still have no idea what to say. She looks between both of our faces and knows something's really wrong if Shane's crying too.

"What happened?" she repeats urgently. "Is it Nate? Jason? Are they okay?"

"Caitlyn," I say again, holding back a sob. "No, th-they aren't okay."

"What happened?" she demands. "Are they in the hospital? Which one? We have to go there. I have to go see him." Any sobs I was holding back break free. How do you tell your best friend that her boyfriend just died? "Mitchie!" she screams desperately. "I need to know what happened!"

"Caitlyn," Shane speaks up and his voice is full of emotion. "You can't go see either of them in the hospital."

"And why not?" she asks angrily with just a hint of fear shining through.

I stand and move toward her, placing a hand on her arm. "They're… they're gone Caitlyn. They're… dead."

"No," she screams angrily, shoving my hand away and backing up until she hits the wall. "Nate is not dead! Nate can't die! Jason can't die!" She keeps going on, screaming at me, until she hits her breaking point.

I watch helplessly as she sinks down the wall, screaming as if physically hurt. And really she might be – I've never personally experienced such a thing as intense heartbreak. My heart was broken now, but it wasn't my boyfriend who'd just been in the plane crash, only two close friends. If it had been Shane… I stop that thought immediately. Shane wasn't on the plane. Shane's okay. He's sitting on the couch right behind me. The guilt hits me again only seconds after the relief does this time. I shouldn't be feeling relieved. Two of my close friends - my best friends' boyfriend, my boyfriend's best friends – just died.

I desperately look back to Shane – needing to make sure he'd really safe. He's watching us over the back of the couch and his fists are clenched again, his knuckles turning white. I try to communicate my feelings to him in that single glance but am sure my tears blur out any message hidden in my eyes.

I know I can't do anything to help my best friend. I have to try, but there's nothing I can do. Hesitantly I step towards her. I kneel beside her and wrap my arms around her in an awkward, one-sided hug. She doesn't even acknowledge me.

"I'm sorry Caitlyn," I cry. "I'm so sorry. This is so terrible. I don't know what to do. I don't know how I can help you. I don't know how to help anyone – not you, Shane or myself." I continue to mumble whatever comes to mind, hoping to be able to reassure her in someway even though I know it isn't possible. "I'm just as upset as you are. I'm just so sorry. I can't even believe this. We shouldn't have let them get on that stupid plane. We should have insisted they drive with us. I'm sorry. If only-"

"Shut up!" she screams suddenly. "Just shut up. I don't want to hear your apologies. I don't want to hear how upset you are."

"I'm just trying to help Caitlyn," I say, sounding every bit the scolded child I feel like.

"Help?" she blinks. "You're trying to help? How the hell do you think it helps to tell me you're just as upset as I am? Do you honestly think that's even true?"

"Caitlyn," Shane interjects. "Don't say anything you're going to regret."

"And you!" she turns on him, ignoring his words. "_Eight years_ they've been your best friends and now-"

"I know!" he snaps, cutting her off. "Do you think I don't feel every bit as upset as you?"

"I know you don't," she seethes. "_I'm_ the one who lost a boyfriend. _I'm_ the one who will never get to marry the love of my life. _I'm_ the one who'll never get to wake up wrapped in his arms again."

"Just because I didn't want to marry either of them doesn't mean I'm not just as upset as you," he roars back. "I lost my two best and closest friends."

I shrink into the background, trying my damnedest to stay out of this. I don't want the screaming and the fighting. I can't handle the screaming and the fighting on top of everything else. We can't be tearing each other apart. We need to hold each other together. As much as I want the fighting to end I can't speak up. I back up until I hit the couch and put my hands over my ears and hum – blocking out the unwanted noise.

This serves as a blessing and a curse. I can't hear my boyfriend and best friend kick each other while they're down. I hear something much worse. _There was an accident – you were one of the people on the emergency call list. It was a private plane. It crashed. No one survived. I'm sorry._ It played over and over in my head – all jumbled up like a really bad remix to an even worse song. I sink down to the floor, my body shaking with sobs.

Why did they have to die? Of all the people in this world, why did it have to be two of the greatest people I'd ever met, two of the sweetest men? If Jason were here he'd know what to say. He'd be able to help Caitlyn, or at least not elicit such an angry reaction. It wasn't fair. Nate would be able to comfort her. She'd let him hold her while she cried her eyes out over the lost of her friends. I couldn't even imagine what it was like for her. To have lost a boyfriend while her best friend got to keep hers. It wasn't fair to Caitlyn. And it's selfish, but I would not sacrifice Shane for her sake. I need Shane. Just like she needs Nate.

All at once the sounds of their fight comes back to me.

"I won't stand here and listen to you devalue my loss," Shane says coldly. "I know you're suffering, but you're not alone in this Caitlyn."

"Of course I am," she scoffed. "Nate's gone. Do you not get that Shane? I'm all alone."

"You're not alone," I sniffle quietly. "You still have us Caitlyn."

"No. You have Shane and he has you. I don't have either of you. I don't have Nate. I don't have Jason."

"Caitlyn," I sigh, getting up and wiping my tears away. "Don't say that. You have us. You have me. We're best friends Caitlyn. I'm here for you."

"Oh, please. Don't act like you weren't glad Shane wasn't on that plane." I visibly wince at the truth in her words and I know she sees it. "Just go," she grits out. "I don't even want to talk to you. Just get out."

And I knew, with those words, that things as I knew them would never be the same. As far as our friendship was concerned, this was the ending.

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**A/N: **This was really hard for me to write. Death's on been on my mind this weekend. It may not be a very good oneshot - I used writing this as a way to express my feelings, but I don't think it could even half convey the way I felt today at the funeral of my best friend's brother. I hope some of it comes across. Sorry the ending seems kind of sudden. I wrote the last line first and worked up to it and that's where I felt it fit. Oh, and my day didn't end this way at least if you were wondering. My friendship is still going strong with the whole family.


End file.
